Friday, April 9, 2010

Spittin Mad

As my friend Abbe often does, I'm going to term this post BRUTALLY HONEST, because I'm SPITTIN MAD.

I can't even tell you how pissed off I am. A bit of background...I joined (what was then) a wonderful organization about five years ago for moms. It was my sanity saver when I started staying home with Brooke. We had a great group of people, fabulous playgroups, etc. While there may still be some great people in the group, I have seen it change a lot in the past few years and most of it is not to my liking.

Since I joined the group I have been getting the donations for the open house. I get fabulous door prizes donated, and 4 years ago I decided to also do goodie bags so that everyone in attendance would leave with something. The goodie bags contain coupons, samples, etc.

This year I gave away all of the fabulous prizes we had donated, and I gave goodie bags to everyone there. A few people even took extras. When we were cleaning up that night, I asked several people if they thought it'd be okay to take the leftover goodie bags and use them for goodie bags for the teachers at the our school at their Christmas luncheon. Everyone thought it was a good idea. So when I got home, I disassembled the bags, sorted out what I had, etc. Two months later, I combined the leftovers with the new donations I got on behalf of the PTO and did goodie bags for our teachers. They were thrilled.

NOW I'm being griped at by someone because I "gave away things that were for our organization to someone else." I just have to say kiss my butt. Seriously. The goodie bag donations were to ensure that all attendees rec'd a gift of some sort, which they did...the rest were leftovers, just that. Let's not be selfish and think "me me me! let's keep everything for ourself!". I gave them to other (probably more deserving) people! To top it off, said person is even going so far as to tell me that I used them for personal gain with the teachers at our school. I am BEYOND PISSED OFF that she would even suggest that I am that kind of person. They were presented as being from the PTO and most of the teachers don't even know me!! Perhaps this person doesn't really understand the act of giving without getting credit? If someone would have told me that night that it "goes against policy to give this stuff away to someone else" then I would have said "fine... where's your trunk so you can take it all home?"

It is sad that an organization I once so loved has caused me so much grief over the last year or two. I invited several friends to be a part of the group because I wanted to share it with them. As time passed, they made several new friends and I no longer seemed to be important to them anymore. Because of some relationships that changed so drastically, I am hestitant to even introduce my new friends to each other / other people. I've been so hurt and burned in the past that I don't want to create the situation to do that again. Now I'm being persecuted for doing what I thought was a GOOD THING, finding a GOOD use for leftover items. I can't believe there are people out there who would even think bad of me for doing this. And get all self righteous about it? I didn't arbitrarily decide to do that, I got the thumbs up from several people first!

It's no wonder people in this world don't want to step up and pitch in and help. Because even when you do so with the best of intentions, and give it your all, someone is always going to fault you for something or not like how you did it. Shame on you, you persons you.


wdozier said...

I'm sorry this happened to you. YOU are such a giving person; don't let someone change that! You were doing the right thing...that person was thinking selfishly! Take ya!

Jennifer Gragg said...

I'm so sorry some random group (wink, wink) would do this to you!!! But I can believe it. I've been burned a few times myself by a (totally random) mommy group & every year I think I'm not going to re-join & somehow I always do. :-\ Women can be so darned mean! I know EXACTLY how you're feeling Angie. I know how disappointing & hurtful it is. And I know what it's like to have friends pass you by to be part of a 'cool group' instead of friends with you! (As if?!) Take it with a grain of salt. You don't need no stinkin' group to be loved by other women. You're fabulous just the way you are! (And FYI, you always did a FABULOUS job with open house. 'They' couldn't have done it w/o you -- obviously.)

Carrie said...

Hey Angie! You did a great thing. Don't stop putting yourself out there, being so thoughtful, creative, and generous. You are a great example to others and I'm positive that the thoughtful things you do are a greater blessing to the recipients than you realize. Putting yourself out there opens yourself to criticism, but you know who you really are and you can feel free to ignore them completely. They can go on being miserable, selfish, and negative, and you can go on being Angie. I know how painful it is to have one's motives questioned, but people who are that quick to criticize, are probably not worth fretting about. And seriously. I am amazed by all the thoughtful things you do.

Rachael said...

ok, I just read this and dang, that is harsh. I would have been spittin mad too if I were you.